One name that keeps popping up with the hardcore is Michael Pachter, an analyst for Wedbush frequently quoted by journalists. Most of the time, Michael Pachter’s name is invoked for derision as a fortune teller who can never say anything correctly. The hardcore love Michael Pachter because his gaffes make the hardcore feel brilliant. Making fun of Michael Pachter has less to do about him than about the hardcore fantasizing about wearing a suit and owning multiple sports cars earned by only putting out ‘analytical posts’ on the nearby gaming forum
The hardcore spend so much time on the message forums gathering Industry information, they cannot believe no one wants to pay them money for their opinions. This is what animates the consistent Michael Pachter reactions from the cons, the few pros, and the occasional person calling him ‘Patcher’ as if he wears overalls and a straw hat.
Michael Pachter, capitalizing on the obsession the hardcore gamers have given him, made his own TV webshow called ‘Pach-Attack’. Looking as innocent as the cat that ate the canary, he beams with smiles while surrounding himself with games from every system and calls his hardcore viewers ‘babies’.
If you wish to strike up conversation with the hardcore gamer, quote something Michael Pachter said about gaming and follow it up with, “Can you believe he gets paid to be so wrong?” The hardcore gamer will nod and say that investors should get their information from the random posters on the gaming message forum. When you agree with this, the hardcore gamer will think you are one of his own and begin giving you unsolicited advice on company stock. Tell the hardcore that he should be an analyst for Fortune 500 companies, and he will either go about his day in a good mood or start more forum threads no one reads.
