Posted by: seanmalstrom | September 28, 2012

#7 Hardware Talk

One would make the mistake that because the hardcore love to talk about a console’s hardware and comparing it to the other toy consoles that the hardcore are interested in the hardware. The truth is that the hardcore have no interest in the engineering. What the hardcore wish to do is to engage in hardware talk.

Hardware talk is a gaming message forum ritual like the peacock dance where the birds show off whose plumage is the longest and, therefore, who is the most superior. The more a hardcore talks about the hardware, the more he is attempting to demonstrate superiority over others in the message forum. Most of the time, the hardcore will just parrot what he read a developer said.

It is hardcore law that a console with ‘better’ hardware will make better games. This is because better hardware allows the Game Gods to ‘more realize their vision’. Better hardware also makes the console more expensive and more out of the hands of the wrong type of gamers.

When you hear a hardcore gamer talk hardware, express astonishment at how he knows so much. This will make the hardcore very happy and like you. Whatever you do, do not talk of the console as anything but a super sonic airplane or a space shuttle. Hardware talk is extremely important to the hardcore. You could even say their egos are on the line.

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