What’s the capital of Ohio? Mario.

Note: This was still in the drafts folder for some reason. I thought it was published on Sunday morning.

Today’s the day for us to buy the above game AGAIN on the Wii.

But let us see the japanese commercial…

Wow! Birdo is Wart’s trophy boyfriend! Who knew?

Ahh, my favorite Nintendo commercial. This commercial could easily be remade with cutting out Super Mario World, replacing the salesman with Reggie Fils-Aime, and replacing the Giant Super Nintendo with a Giant Wii (the hot Nintendo babes never need replacement. They are ‘evergreen’ every generation).

I actually bought my Mario Collection when the store opened due to its limited availability. When I went to the store when it opened when Mario 5 came out, there were people waiting to get in. There was no repeat of that this time.

However, there was someone who was rushing in when the store opened to buy a Wii. Specifically, to buy a red Wii with Mario 5.

“But Malstrom,” says the reader who rudely keeps interrupting my posts. “How do you know he wants to buy a Wii for Mario 5? Maybe it is because he likes his Wii red.”

I know this, for sure, because he was disappointed that there were not many red accessories to go with the red Wii. He began asking whether he should get a regular color Wii with Mario 5.

So what does this tell me? It tells me that Mario 5 is still moving hardware. That man was willing to shell out the money for the hardware just to get at Mario 5.

Do you know what that means, reader?

“It means that Iwata will say Mario 5 isn’t responsible for any Wii hardware sales, and we won’t see another 2d Mario again because Miyamoto doesn’t feel like making them.”

Most excellent reader! You are catching on the ways of Nintendo.

And now look at this email:

I pre-ordered mine online a month ago, and checking back today, I found that it is already back-ordered. I under-estimated this game thinking a month in advance would be safe enough. I remember people talking about how this game wouldn’t sell, and I can’t help but wish they were actually correct with that statement at this point.

Now, suddenly, I see some of the same people who previously bashed the existance of this game on the Wii looking for it everywhere franticly! Isn’t it funny how people are sometimes? Apparently, it’s currently sold out at Toy’s R Us, Gamestop, Walmart, and Best Buy. I hear Amazon stopped taking pre-orders for a little while, too. Hopefully my order will still go through in the end and it is just a glitch in the system.

Good luck on finding this game. I don’t think it’ll sell like hotcakes made of gold, but expect to see this game out of stock at quite a few retail stores upon release.
._____________________ 

And this is just an old SNES rom on a disc. I am sure in the headquarters of Nintendo, the decision makers turn to one another and are saying,

“You know what this means, don’t you?”

“That’s right. No more 2d Mario. Only make 3d Mario for now on!”