Posted by: seanmalstrom | October 5, 2012

#11 Gamer Girls

What could the hardcore gamer like more than a girl gamer? Nothing would please the hardcore more than to have daily conversations with a woman about Kingdom Hearts, Pokemon, and PlayStation 3 exclusives. However, if the gamer girl has superior knowledge of gaming, the hardcore immediately lose all attraction. The hardcore must feel superior in all ways when it comes to gaming.

Once finding a gamer girl, the hardcore will immediately (before he loses her) parade her on the gaming message forum declaring “I have a girlfriend now…. and she likes video games.” The ‘and she likes video games’ is intended for the other hardcore to feel jealous. Sometimes photos are posted. If not, then it is possible the gamer girl might look like this [scary pic].

Gamer girls do exist, and they share common traits. Gamer girls all have black hair and most wear glasses. They all got into gaming because of a brother playing games (most gamer girls have older brothers). Their reading preference tends to be fantasy with a love for watching horror movies.

Gamer girls also have ambitions to become a creative writer like a novelist. There are no exceptions to this. Conversations with a gamer girl tend to be her talking about how creative she is, how she is destined to be a writer, and how she is also never in the mood to write. In addition, she may have pictures of dragons.

The reader should not be surprised of gamer girls ‘proving’ how much of a gamer they are by playing Dude-Bro first person shooter games (this will alarm the hardcore who feel the dude-bro games are the ‘wrong type of games’). In addition, expect many gamer girls to have a PHD in Final Fantasy.

The gamer girl tends to make her relationship work with the hardcore by letting him believe he is always better when it comes to matters of gaming. When the hardcore begins to annoy her, she effortlessly directs him to a console to play games while she gets things done.


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