Posted by: seanmalstrom | November 2, 2014

Moving

I am in the completion process of moving across Houston near the port area. Fuck 290.

Highway 290 - Houston, TX, United States

Above: The growing Energy Corridor with the exodus of people into Texas has made highways like 290 unworthy to drive. “But Malstrom, I am from California, and the traffic there is so bad that it takes an hour to go a few feet in some places.” A California truck driver is telling me 290 is getting that bad. 290 is Construction Wonderland where whenever anything is completed construction, something else is being built. It never ends. The more the highway expands, the more people come!

290 was in a movie with Charlie Sheen called “The Chase”. The movie is bad but entertaining bad. Lots of 290 in it.

Thechaseposter.jpg

Above: This is how Malstrom rides.

Anyway, at my new place I have electricity but no Internet. Oh noes! Luckily, I am from a pre-Internet generation. I’ll consider it a vacation from people trying to contact me. More interesting is that my computer monitor has decided to turn purple. I suppose that means it is dying out. So no super-cool PC games for me except for the ones that don’t rely on strong colors (meaning pre-1990 PC games). Even better, my NES is there with a large ancient TV I’ve kept around for retro gaming. It’s like I’ve gone back in time! At least for a little while.

I even picked up these NES titles:

A dog-like enemy representing the Plutonium Boss is in the center of the image with a large, red crosshair above and off-center of the boss. Below the boss is yellow text that says "Authentic Arcade Edition!" To the left of the boss in the image are two seals of approval by Nintendo, one of them gold and the other being red. Above the boss and the crosshair, towards the top and aligned to the left, is the title of the game "Blaster Master" in brown and all caps. On the very top of the image is a blue tip that contains the Sunsoft logo in red letters followed by black text saying "for the Nintendo Entertainment System". The background of the image are closeup shots from the video game itself.

The Battle of Olympus (NES)

It’s amazing how games like these cannot be made anymore. Blaster Master cannot be made because the Game Industry would think it is ‘too complicated’ for the audience to have your guy get out of the tank and do dungeons. “Why not stay in the tank the entire time?” the suits would say. Perhaps that is why Blaster Master 2 was such a failure.

1943 could never be made today. Can you imagine a World War 2 shmup where the plan shoots lasers and summons lightning that flashes the screen? “This is not how the Battle of Midway actually occurred!” people would huff.

Battle of Olympus could never be made today because we are told that Zelda II type gameplay was “a failure” and that “no one likes that”. According to Aonuma, what people actually like is “cutting grass” and “collect-a-thons”. Swashbuckling action? No.

The games today have been neutered. They lack that edge.


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