Posted by: seanmalstrom | July 16, 2017

Email: Girl culture and why more women would be happier if they played video games

I was reading your article about the NY times guy saying how men need to stop playing video games and get married to make today’s women happy and after reading everything it got me thinking about how no one talks about what’s wrong with women today. Probably because anyone who would say anything slightly negative would be raked across the coals for being “anti feminist.”
Thankfully I’m a woman who can say stuff I think some guys would like to say. I apologize that this email has 2 long parts.

First off, let’s talk about “girl culture.” What is “girl culture?” Well you see happier versions of it on TV where you see this group of women sipping wine and talking about shoes and junk. But in reality this is usually gossip about other women and what they want from their perfect guy. I always felt like an outlier of “girl culture.” I was a bit of a tomboy growing up and this is fine in elementary school when you just play on the playground and play with toys but, at least for me, when you hit the pre teen years, the girls seem to become obsessed with boys and gossip. I remember being in third grade THIRD GRADE!! And just wondering why all the girls in my class just wanted to stand around gushing over the New Kids on the Block or trying to get a tan on the play ground. I remember one of my best friends was a boy because we both liked NES games and I remember the two of us hanging out on the playground talking about our favorite NES games. My mom thought there was something wrong with me because I didn’t have a “clique” of girlfriends and didn’t spend hours gossiping on the phone. I got more enjoyment out of playing video games. This continued on through my adult life. If you’re not a girl into “girl culture.” Then other women will shun you. You don’t even have to do anything. I remember a youtuber saying how nothing a man could say to a women could be worse than how treat each other and there is truth to that statement. My last job I worked before my daughter was born, I was in a small office with a four other women which I figured would be laid back and quiet soon made me miserable. The work itself was fine but two of the other women treated me like dirt the day I started. I was always friendly and pleasant, never did anything to antagonize any of them but I could just feel the resentment. My husband thinks it was because I had a college degree and they didn’t or maybe because I had my life together better than they did but this is something that you see in female circles. There are times I wish I had girlfriends but at the same time I’d rather be alone and happy with my video games than sit around and gossip with other women who’d stab me in the back the first chance they get.

I also think too many women feel that having a man means having someone to entertain you. It’s not enough for a man to work hard and take care of the family, apparently now women seem reliant on a man to entertain them because they have no interests or hobbies or friends of their own. I found the couples who are happy are the ones who actually share interests whether it’s sports or video games or movies. I remember seeing an episode of Dr. Phil where a wife was complaining that her husband went camping with his friends all the time. The husband mentioned how she didn’t like camping but also how she had no friends and no real hobbies. While Dr. Phil did suggest the husband not going out camping every single weekend, he did suggest to the wife to pursue some interests of her own. I know too many women who get married, have kids and that’s their whole life and suddenly the kids are grown and don’t know what to do with themselves because they forgot to find something to do for their own fun. I don’t have this problem in my marriage. I don’t care if my husband wants to play games for a few hours as long as everything we needed to get done is taken care of. One evening our daughter was watching cartoons and coloring, he went to play on the computer, I pulled out my Switch and played something.

Seriously if a woman is mad her man isn’t spending enough time with her then she probably doesn’t have a life of her own.

I cannot speak about all women, only local women. Men are not sentient creatures to these women. To them, men’s purpose is nothing more than to fulfil a role in a script they have written in their pretty little heads. If a man goes outside this script, the girl goes bonkers.

What is the script? Probably something out of a TV show or book. Men have to make a choice: live out her script or live out their script. My choice is to live out my script and see if anyone is compatible with my script (my script is so awesome!). But I do not think women care about compatibility as it is about a guy fulfilling her script.

When you buy a cat, you expect the cat to do certain things. The cat will purr, will sleep, and go “meow”. To them, men are just big cats. If the cat starts to do things like fly, stay awake, and go “boom!”, the owner will freak out.

I’ve noticed a similar response with employers when you start to go outside the script (such as a technician that starts to study calculus and engineering). Dammit! You are supposed to be exactly what other people think of you! Who do you think you are trying to live out life based on your own self-image and your own written script?

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